Everybody Poops!! (and yes you have to wipe it)

Well it is that time again for another weekly update. It was actually a pretty quiet week so this may not be all that long. But I wanted to keep the updates coming so when I am all alone after Nicole goes back to school I can look back on the great summer and remind myself that It's only temporary and for one more year. Lets see on Saturday night we went and saw Get Smart the new Steve Carrell Movie. It was a pretty funny movie. It was exactly what I had hoped that it would be a movie that didn't take itself to seriously and was a good 2 hrs of light fun. If you have a few hours to kill and want to laugh a bit I would tell you go see it.

Sunday was the big potty training day. My Nicole went to the other Nicole's to Potty train Edawg. From what I gather it was this one day potty training thing that my wife told my sister about. It involves getting a doll that pees and throwing a party so that the child then becomes very excited about Pooping. Or something like that. Well apparently there were mixed results in the beginning as Ethan was much more interested in playing with Nicole than pooping in the potty. Well at some point someone in Nsquared as I like to call them as of now decided that he should call mickey to tell him that he pooped (in the potty). The problem was is that Mickey, like Santa is very busy and you can't just call Mickey. I guess you could write him a letter but that would kinda defeat the purpose and take way to long. So anyway someone in the braintrust over there decided that I need to be called and that I will be Mickey at work. The issue here is that I was not made aware of this plan. So here I am sitting at work and my wife calls me. I am all busy and stuff(No I was not I am never busy this damn economy sees to that) and I see the phone ringing.
So I pick it up and my wife says "Mickey?" Now this has me quite startled as It was the last thing I was expecting to hear. Was she dating some Irish dude behind my back? Was she thinking she called a liquor store? What exactly was going on here? Then I hear "Micky Mouse?" Thank God I think as I use my quick goat thinking (Adam Sandler Reference) and put it all together. So I immediately go into Mickey mode. The problem here is that my Mickey voice sounds like his would sound if he has been smoking crack for the last 10 years alla Amy Wienhouse. But fortunately Ethan didn't know this and he accepted me as Mickey Mouse. The whole thing seemed to work very well and he seemed very excited about it. I doubt he was less excited than I was. It was really cool to be a part of something like that. I miss so much with my retarded schedule so getting all of those phone calls meant alot to me. If you guys read this Thanks so much for letting me share in the moment.

But that was not the funniest part of the day..This story is brought to you second hand. In an effort to maintain my documentary integrity for the summer I must protect my source and cannot name names. But apparently after the first poop in the potty there was a life altering life changing moment for my sister. Standing there basking in her glory as her firstborn was using the potty preparing to call Mickey it dawned on her that she still had to wipe him. I could see how this would be somewhat of a buzzkill. But apparently we were also potty training my sister that day as this would prove to be a little more difficult task than we may have first thought. It seems that upon Ethans completion of calling Mickey and in the middle of the joy and excitement that comes along with such a moment he proudly exclaimed "Theres something in my butt!!" With this he reaches into his Hindle region and pulls out a used piece of toilet paper that was left from the wiping. Now again I was not there (although I would have killed to have seen the look on everyones faces!!!) But this story had me in tears when I heard it. Yes Nikki you not only have to wipe but you also must remove the evidence :) -- Love ya sis :) These are the stories that make this blog worth doing. I am so glad one day I will be able to look back on that story and have a laugh.

Ok on to Monday... Not a whole lot happened at all same with Monday. But Tuesday was a whole nother rash of crazy stuff. So I set out to start my day with but one goal in mind I need an oil change. Simple right... wrong... See God has been really hooking me up lately and apparently Tuesday was a day that he wanted to have some fun with me in return. So I am sitting in my car at the oil place all pulled in and ready to go. I hear the familiar "pop the hood please" So I go to pop the hood. Only nothing happens. I can't pull the lever the hood won't pop this is not good at all. So of course we had to get everyone involved there are like 8 dudes hitting my hood as I pull on the lever to see if it will pop. Well it won't so me and my trusty sidekick (Ben) are off to the dealership to see what the hell is going on with it. On the way there my phone won't stop ringing and look at that my check engine light comes on. FANTASTIC!!! Now this happened last summer on a supper hot day and I paid $148.oo to have them turn it off and tell me... we don't know what the issue is tell us if it comes back on... So I am totally in a panic and get to the dealership thinking OMG something is now wrong with Shirley(my car). We get to the dealership at about 12:40 how do I know this? Well apparently the service guys ALL take lunch from 12:00-1:00. So we now have 2o minutes to kill that me and Ben spent looking at new cars and me giving him some water I had in a Wendy's cup. Well anyway these Bozo's look at it and bang on it for like 25minutes and then tell me "yeah we are sorry it doesn't seem to want to open" WELL NO FRICKIN Kidding. They also tell me that they can't check my check engine light with out getting under the hood. ( Patrick told me that was not the case but I don't know a thing about cars so who knows maybe it is like that on my model) At this point I am a bit uhh Upset. So I try one last place Vasick Brothers in Glen Burnie. These are the guys who I have taken my car to in the past and have always had great results with. Well what do you know they have my hood popped in like 5 minutes. He got some metal thing and a little skateboard thing he laid on and went in from the bottom. It popped he cleaned it out problem solved. Thanks Mitsubishi guys for being absolute tards. Well then I tell my guy about the check engine light.... He gets in the car turns the key.. No light... LOL. He is like "Uhhh dude your check engine light is not on" So anyway The light is off I went and got my oil change and went home and took the dog for a walk. But still it was about 2:30ish and I was beyond frustrated and embarrassed.

So what did I do to waylay my frustration... Well as nice as the thought of an Ice cold Miller sounded that was not the play today. Today I needed to totally lose the rest of my manhood.
So I did what any man who wants to do that would do I went to see a kids movie... alone.





Wall E was a movie I had been wanting to see. What can I say I like Disney/Pixar movies. I have liked all of them in fact Finding Nemo is my Favorite movie. So Naturally I had to see this. I had tried many things with many people to avoid going alone but alas I was not successful on any front. So I get there buy my ticket and get in line for a soda and small popcorn. I'm retarded when I go to the movies I have to get popcorn. I roll up on the counter and there is no one behind me (keep in mind it's Tuesday afternoon) so the Large Black Gangsta chick behind the counter starts talking to me. "you need a drink for anyone else?" I respond no it's just me.


"Ahhh ok what movie are you here to see?" Wall E. Now imagine if you will a look of total disbelief on Queen Latefia's face. (She looks a little like her but I wanted to pick a large woman that everyone who is reading this would know). "Really" She asks Yeah I reply I for the life of me couldn't get anyone to come see this with me and I don't have kids. She then just starts laughing at me. I try to laugh it off, yeah it didn't work.





So I slink away and butter my popcorn which I get on my shirt (THANKS GRANDMA DOAN!! great genes there :) and head off to the theatre. I get in and I am a little early like 25 minutes so I sit in the middle of the theater and start messing around on my phone. Well as the time passes the theatre fills up. Apparently lots of parents taking kids now that summer is here. About 5 minutes before the movie starts the theater looks like this....

Yeah that's me in the middle. surrounded by moms and dads and kids all saying and thinking I am trying to steal their kid or something. It was funny that I am not even exaggerating this. Like did the lady at the snack counter start alerting people that I was going to this movie alone? I felt a little like a leper but I totally understand. If It were me with my kid I wouldn't sit by the weird guy all alone on a Tuesday afternoon at a kids movie either. If I had been any creepier they may have just issued an amber alert lol.

Well finally the movie started and what can I say without giving away the movie.... It was a Disney Pixar movie. It made me laugh, it tugged at the heartstrings, it was cute. It was everything I was hoping I would get. It also had an interesting environmental warning/message that I really didn't see coming. It goes right up there with The Rest 4 stars go see it. The interesting thing is there is very little Dialogue .. lots of sounds and I mean there are words but the way that the artists have learned how to show emotion in animation you really don't realize that there is very little dialogue. It was Really cool. You just kinda filled in the words in your head while it was happening subconsciously.

I can't say enough about how much I enjoyed the movie. So I get home walk the dog and then me and wife head to Cheesburger in Paradise. This is a restaurant in Pasedna that Nicole says has the best mixed drinks Eva!!!!-(Like a valley girl). We had a waiter named Shek.. which of course sounds like Shrek so we had some laughs about that and called it an evening.

Wed was pretty much me and the wife just relaxing.... that is about it... Ok see you soon...

Dad

Happy 4th.

Well Holy Poop I know Right??!!! You are getting an on time update with only one day of events for me to talk about....... The 4th of July... A day of family, friends, BBQs and Fireworks.. (and if your not careful dismemberment and Hospital visits) The day started off innocently enough with me finally agreeing to go to the gym with Wizzle.... Which I had successfully put off for about 2 solid weeks...After that we had breakfast and we went over Grandma and Grandpa's.



We got there about 1pm which was nice. The four of us got to hang out and talk for a few hours which is something that we don't get to do all that often. We did the usual played with the dog by the pool and conversed. I am glad we got to spend the better part of 2 of the last three days with my mom and dad. It's always fun to catch up. Well about 4:15ish the Haslups showed up and the real (crazy) fun began..




Mike cooked some awesome wings but the real fun was Edawg. He is just so cool right now... I mean literally He is the coolest guy in any room he is in. I half expect him to put on a black leather jacket give us the double thumbs up and an "Ehhhhhhhayyyy" He was all over the place in the pool on his rocking horse and one time he his grandma and my wife were pushing an invisible rock. Which I had no idea about until I walked in and they were pushing it into me. What is funny is that apparently pushing an invisible rock and being a Zombie require you to walk the exact same way. So upon me and Ben opening the door to come we were met by these three moaning and pushing... well for a second lets just say I was a little concerned.



The rest of the afternoon had the guys watching baseball and Patrick and Tina who made a suprise guest appearance today's episode. I was told to not expect them but low and behold they came .. well Patrick did, I didn't really see Tina at all although the rumors persist that she was there. They stayed for about 45 minutes ate dinner and left to go to a movie. Why? I dunno we had quite the night of seeing fireworks planned but apparently Hancock couldn't wait. Those two right now are just a piece of work. I do pride myself on being able to remember that age and how I felt at that time and all but these two are on another planet. It's not a bad planet so much as it's like I am watching a car wreck but I can't help because I have no room to talk kinda planet. I should point out here I did a very similar thing in distancing myself from the family by staying in Pittsburgh so much even after they came down to MD. The thing is, is that there is a real cool dynamic with the Haslups, me and the wife and the 'rents. They are missing all of it. It's also a resource I wish I had at the time but didn't. They could get so much insight and help with things we care about them alot but right now they have this weird us against the world thing going that frankly everyone is growing a bit tired of. (In all honesty his whole plan for football season has me not looking forward to it nearly as much as I normally do. I think we have a great family tradition going on, yeah it has it's glaring flaws I admit. But this battle he is gonna start can only end badly. It's gonna leave alot of people in the middle and in the end there are gonna be alot of hurt feelings on everyones part. As much as I hate to say it..I am a little happy this year I have a job that will allow me to stay out of this fray for the most part. Kiddo when you get here and get to know me you will realize what a huge thing that was that I just said. I used to live for those 18 Sundays a year and it has killed me to miss them the last two years.. now I am kinda happy I work.. that sucks. Hopefully this will be resolved prior to you getting here midway through the 2009 season)



I think with me if I had older siblings I would have been more involved in the family thing even at the time. It just sucks because again I did it as well it's just that at about 28 I realized how dumb it was. Now I am watching Pacman do it and I really can't say a word because he is gonna remind me that I did it. Watching someone make the same mistakes you made is painful when you care about them. At least I didn't have the benefit of watching someone do something dumb.. I got to do all the dumb things without really knowing the consequences. I thought I did, Hell I was 23 I knew everything !!! yeah ... it's a sobering day when you realize you don't. I just wish he could kinda rediscover some of the feelings and conversations I am sure he had when he heard the news of my stupid exploits. In all Honesty I painted a really good road map for how to screw up. He just needs to think back a bit I really think it would help him out. In the end we'll all be here for him when he figures it out but in the meantime it sucks.



Wow this post has taken a weird turn OK enough Patrick .. when he figures it out I'll be here-back to the fourth. OK so the day at Grandmas ended and the Race began. We had about 52 and a half minutes to get from grandmas to drop of Ben, get mom changed, put stuff in fridge, Poop the dog and get to The Haslups.. The problem it takes about an hour to do all of that. Needless to say we got it done with a whole minute to spare. So once we get to Nicole and Mike's it starts pouring. So I was thinking no fireworks and I have to admit the gym and the swimming and the running around had me worn out so I had a grouchy half hour. I was being a total Poohead wishing that we could get out of the fireworks. In the end we got a last second call from Nicole's friend Michelle and we raced off in the rain to see them.. Fortunately I got out of my tired/grouchy mood while running to the car.



Well we didn't get on base to see them. They started while we were still on our way and it was still raining a tiny bit. But all in all the mad dash there, the parking in some peoples guest parking spots we didn't know and running Edawg to the fireworks was fun.. It was really memorable much more so I think than if we had gone to fair and it had gone according to plan. I think in 15 years we will all be able to mention the fireworks we watched form the street in the rain while looking through a traffic light and have one hell of a laugh. Especially at my dad telling us (incorrectly I might add) 4 times they were over and Edawg noticing halfway through we were next to a dunkin donuts. It turned out to be an awesome day one that I am glad I was apart of as it made me want to have you around so much more. I have to admit I am not one to get jealous of alot as lately I am beginning to realize how blessed I am. But last night running too the fireworks seeing E dawg on Mikes shoulders and Nicole carrying Jax in his little travel seat, grandparents and aunt and uncle in tow... well I have never been more jealous of any two people in my life. I really can't wait to be dragging you into our wild and crazy family adventures. It's an awesome family that in today's world we are so Blessed to have. You are gonna so love it...



Dad

Rainbows shooting out of our Faces!!!!!!

Again I am sorry I have not updated much the last few days I have just been busy. But in order to keep up with what is going on in our lives I have a new update. As you can see from the picture on the left (Of me your mother and Ben) things around here are very different than they have been. Apparently we have Rainbows shooting out of our faces while running through fields and making pottery like in Ghost. This is an observation from Katie who I mentioned in previous blogs. Apparently the wife and I have been doing alot together and since your mom talks about it at work we have become quite the annoyingly in love couple. Which is funny because after 11 years together you think we would be over it. Apparently we are not which I think is a good thing. I Actually take alot of pride in the fact I have such a great marriage... lord knows I am totally out of my league with your mother but apparently the nightly doses of rohipnol are keeping her dazed enough to keep me around :)

Actually I really just think the last 4 weeks we have really reconnected. We have always felt we had something special going on as far as relationships go. But every couple thinks that. But deep down just in being around people day to day and seeing our Friends and families relationships we knew that there was something really special about what was going on. I do however think that the last year with your mother working and going to school and me struggling with the housing market in the toilet we might have slipped into a more run of the mill situation. When Nicole asked me in April if she should take a summer class I am very glad the Lord had us decide against it. It has been an absolute blessing to hang with my wife as much as I have the last month or so. That is another reason I am updating this blog as much as I can ..... I know I have another difficult year ahead of me starting at the end of August when she goes back. I am really gonna miss her and the time that we spent together. It's pretty weird as right now work is a total mess and I am so stressed out but when I get home and see her I just feel better. Its hard to explain. I can be so miserable and disheartened all day then come home and see the wife and just feel better.

Anyway that is kinda the wrap up on the overall. For a more detailed look at what is going on here is the run down. First off the weekend........ We had this big marketing campaign with newspapers TV the whole 9. This was for our big grand opening. And let me tell you for two solid days I was on my feet in sell mode. I love being in sell mode. The problem was with so many people around I really could not focus one long enough to really accomplish my goal. Needless to say I thought for the second time last week I had sold the spec house....... But alas on Sunday I got the email that it was "all happening so fast" and that they would not be buying. I was crushed to say the least.. I mean I really took it harder than I should have but it was what it was and I was really upset. So with the whole grand opening nothing really came of it but people showed up ate our sandwiches and drank our sodas then took our doorprize wine and left. I have never in my life worked so hard for so little.

But in classic Wizzle to the rescue fashion I got a text on Saturday night asking me if I could get beer and would I be willing to grill for a little BBQ with the minions. Well if you ever know anything about me know that the answer to "would you mind picking up beer?" is always a uhhhh yeah I will be happy to get beer. So we BBQed with the minions and played Wii. In classic fashion we wiped the floor with them but this time Wizzle was the one who carried the team she drove her little wii kart like it was on fire.

Then she wanted to blow up our Neighbors.... so we had these little wal mart fireworks that the minions had gotten for our little party.. A few little light up things nothing too good. Well anyway we have some neighbors who are either pedophiles or just very die hard soccer people. It was about 10pm and out they come in their little jerseys to go play soccer. Well the wife looks at us and says... "Wouldn't it be funny if they drove over our fire works and their car blew up" Yeah thats how she rolls.....So little one if we are visiting mommy in prison one day because she blew something up we will look back at this as a cry for help that I totally ignored. Don't worry I will teach you how to bake a cake around a file so she can break out.

Finally on Tuesday night we went to the Green turtle in Columbia. Turns out after 3 years of living here we still have no idea where the hell we are going. Yeah ... it's pretty embarrassing but it took us like a half hour to get there. It was pretty much the blind leading the blind. While there we watched the O's game and I realized that your mom pretty much knows the lineup.. Magic Magic .. Magic.. Magic...... It was pretty impressive.





To cap off our week of updates we hit the Orioles game last night...... Ohhh what a night... So we decided that we would take the Metro down..... This was pretty much so that we could not have to worry so much about driving long distances after uhhhhh drinking chocolate milk... by chocolate milk I mean beer. This seemed like a good idea. Well we did get some stories ..we get to the station and there is the train but only one ticket machine is working... not too too bad but the problem is there are 2 couples in front of us again... you might think not so bad.... well apparently they could not figure out how to use the machine. First they put in a 20 and their change came back in these new one dollar coins... yeah no one knew what the hell they were but these people felt obligated to block the machine while they tried to figure it out.. they were looking at these things like friggin Korean money came out of the machine babbling on about tokens... I admit prior to this evening I had no idea that ole Sacajawea was gone but one look at the coin with George Washington and a $1 on it and I pretty much was able to figure out it was not a train token (which don't exist) The machine gives you a card.. yet these friggin yahoos kept trying to tell us they were tokens then counted them out and separated them from the quarters.... It was literally like Sesame street for senile old people. Meanwhile I am watching the train pull away..Bye Bye train... inside I am ready to punch these idiots in the face like WTF if you can't figure it out move..... Just as the rage is building the one guy looks at me and says we should move this guy here (he means me) is being so patient. Yeah thanks buddy .....





So we finally get our tickets and notice a guy across the track talking away on his bluetooth... he is talking and laughing then getting all serious...... the wife even said... "people look so funny talking on their bluetooths." The problem was that then he turned around to walk the other way and well there was no bluetooth...The only thing this guy was talking too were the voices in his head...... Scary



But not as scary as the three guys who then got on the train..... on sat behind us one in front of us and one beside us... so we were pretty much boxed in. Redlights going off like hey awesome I missed the first train so I could get mugged on this one... SCORE!!! I was beginning to think we might be ok because they were all playing with this one kids phone when *ClicK* and a dude pulls out a knife.... that no lie looked like this

Needless to say I nearly pooped myself.. that was really the first time in my life I thought I might die... I was just hoping that while I was bleeding out that the wife would get away.. In the end all my fears were for naught as apparently you can use a huge knife to fix a cell phone... He either stabbed it or just intimidated it but either way he put the knife away stopped messing with the phone and got of the train. Let's just say we caught a ride home with my parents who also happened to be at the game.. No more public transportation for us.

The game was great it was the shortest of the season so your mom liked that. We sat with my parents and watched Cabrera pitch a 105 pitch complete game and lead the O's to a 5-2 win.. That was pretty much the week kiddo. Tomorrow is the family BBQ for the 4th of July. I already smell drama in the day ... hmmmmmmm could it be coming from the Haslups. I dunno tune in next time.....

Dad

Racing through the last week...

Well little one I thought that I would be updating this a little more regularly but I got busy this weekend, my bad. But to make it up to you I will be giving you a full update on the week. First and most importantly we saw Pearl Jam. Now this has been my favorite band for roughly 13 years or so needless to say I was pretty stoked. Your mom by the way was a real trooper. See we took the metro down and had to get there quite early as all of the fan club people have to get their tickets from the will call. The line was impossibly long but it moved quite quick. The story here is after 10 years in the fan club I was pretty confident our seats were gonna be very close.

So up we go to get the tickets and by this point I am getting nervous I really want good seats and had not seen PJ in about 5 years so my excitement was growing. Opening up the envelope ..... drumroll.... OUR SEATS SUCK!!!!!! yup section 100 on the side. Not even on the floor. I was crushed. It seems when I renewed my tenclub membership in '06 I did something funky and screwed up my seniority. So I was about as disappointed as I had been in a while. (Side not the following day I got the problem fixed and our seniority back but obviously the show was already over. So maybe the next tour we will be close) At this point all the wind is out of my sales and I really just wanna crawl under a rock. I quickly typed out an email to tenclub on the ole blackberry but I know there is nothing that can get done now.

So we head off to the Green turtle which is a sports bar that is in the arena. Needless to say your mom reminded me why she is truly the yin to my yang. Almost right away she goes into her "cheer up the husband" mode. See this is a mode that she normally reserves for when she really needs it. It does not come out often but when she sees that I am really crushed about something. It's just a few small changes on her part. Her smile gets a bit brighter and I can really see the love she has for me in her eyes. It always turns me around. She laughed at my corny jokes and before long (and after a few beers) I was feeling pretty good. It wasn't the perfect situation but it was what it was. I was seeing my favorite band hands down with my best friend who also happens to be my wife. I didn't have to drive home and the atmosphere for a Pearl Jam concert is like nothing you have ever seen before. See, they are by no means a trendy band. The stadium is filled with other idiots like me who have been following them for years and know every word to every song. Many of the people in the arena have been or are going to multiple shows on the tour and everyone is just really tuned in. So getting to sing Black (again this has been my favorite song for as long as I can remember) with 18,000 other crazys is just a really special experience. Another thing I like about them is every show on every tour is different. You are gonna get different songs every night. The only song you are pretty much sure to hear is Daughter. I would have also said Betterman but they didn't play at this show. So this is the first time I have seen Pearl jam and not heard that. Other than that you have no idea going in what is gonna get played. This was the set list for our show.

MAIN SET: Hard To Imagine, Severed Hand, Hail Hail, Do The Evolution, Small Town, Evacuation(Partial), Corduroy, I'm Open, I Am Mine, I Got ID, Daughter/(Hey-Ho), Light Years, Even Flow, Green Disease, You Are, You, Who You Are, Why Go

ENCORE 1: Comatose, Sad, Given To Fly, Come Back, Grievance, Black/(We Belong Together), Rearviewmirror

ENCORE 2: No More, Last Kiss, Crazy Mary (Victoria Williams), Alive, All Along The Watchtower (Bob Dylan), Yellow Ledbetter/(Star Spangled Banner) ((Francis Scott Key))

Needless to say the show was awesome. Even their new stuff from thier new album was seemlessly stitched into the show. It was just an awesome night. The Verizon center turned on the main get the hell out lights and Eddie just powered right on through.

Anyway that was Sunday. On Monday we got together with our neighbors Rob and Jennnaahhh. They are the young couple in our complex that we live in. They are us like 5 years ago. Sometimes they can be a little young in how they approach stuff. Or more accurately me and your mom are getting old. Rob and Jennahhh are like yeah it's 9pm what are you guys doing? Me and the wife.... "watching the end of the O's game and going to bed." Yeah I am starting to feel like Dan and Rosanne Conner. I don't know what the heck happened but I am so ready for bed by about 1030 anymore. I remember the good ole days when I would be up gaming till 2 or 3am..yeah not anymore. I am freaking tired. Anyway they wanted to play some Mario Party 8. A game that is me and your mothers current obsession. The Wii has really brought us together, and as long as I don't win too much the Wii filled nights are a blast. The thing is that I think your mother is actually pretty good at video games. The problem is I have been playing them about 20+ years longer than she has. Sooo generally I win. But I do believe that if she honed her skills she would be Kick ass at games. As you can tell we have been playing alot of Wii lately and I was more than up for putting the smack down on the young bucks. It's all fun and games till I gotta defend the family video game honor.

So over we go. Me your mom and Ben. for a video game collision of titans. Needless to say me and your mother wiped the floor with them. There was blood and carnage everywhere. Even Ben was Like Damnnnnnnnnnnnn we owned you. He did his part by relentlessy assulting thier dog's ear at every opportunity. Then we went to coldstone got some icecream and we were all in bed by 11. Wow we are so freaking lame..... But it was fun but lame, again this is why we need you to come along the party jersey is retired. We are settling into a more adult lifestyle. We had been resisting it for the better part of the last 10 years but now instead of crazy nights a bars and clubs we genuinely enjoy playing some games walking the dog and capping it all off with a trip to ice cream shop. Wow We really need football to come back just to spice things up a little. Maybe go all voodoo crazy and have hotwings while watching football.

Finally on to Tuesday and Wednesday... Two words Mario Kart. I was lucky enough to get my hands on an elusive copy of Mario kart. Which is a Mario Racing game. We have pretty much been just playing that for two solid days. It is a really good time that the two of us can do together. Again your mom is really good at it.. Her big thing is that she gets very frustrated whenever say a turtle shell gets slammed into her butt. (in the game) It really throws her all off. I find that it sucks but hell it happened lets get back into the race. Once she gets over that she will Pwn.

Mini housing rant incoming (read at your own risk)

We also spent a good portion of our day looking at homes. I have no idea what is gonna happen with that. We just currently hate where we live. It is getting too small. We are already dreading things like the holidays because once you put a tree and the snow village up we are pretty much out of space in our home and there is no where to go. With Ben no longer a puppy I can only imagine that this year will be even worse. It's just not fun at all as I Like the holiday decorations and I like having people over. But right now our house is just to small. Even for the three of us. It's like sardines in there. There is no way we could add you in such a small space. I would seriously go off the Bay bridge. I just hate the place we live. Other than Rob and Jennahhhh all our Friends have left and those two are moving in August.

See you would think the easy solution would be to buy a house. Unfortunately I am a chicken. I want to buy a house.. I do.. But the problem is I sell new homes.. and this year absolutely sucks when it comes to selling houses. I just am not selling enough to feel comfortable taking on a much larger payment for 30 years with the economy right now. Everyone tells me it's gonna turn around and I believe that it will. But until I can regularly start selling homes again and your mother finishes grad school I just think that us doing this right now would be stupid. Even if we were to buy in January I think that would be dumb. We would be coming of a record low house selling year and your mom is gonna graduate in July.

With a masters degree and the income boost that will provide and hopefully the economy returning mid '09 seems like we will be in a much stronger position to buy a house you can grow up in. Where as buying this year will likely get us something we may or may not be able to sell in year. I think buying a house for a year is a really crappy idea to tell you the truth. Why buy it when hopefully we can get something twice as big and nice if we wait a year. Also if we buy this January and we want to move into a non starter home next Jan. We will have a house we have to sell. Which we will most likely lose money on. The whole game seems dumb. It seems to me patience is kinda a virtue here. But we HAVE to get out of where we are now. I hate it. So we are currently looking to rent something a tad bigger for next year. At least big enough that when you come along we will not have to have you sleep in a car seat on the bar :).

I really want to buy and Honestly I think your mom would... But I am taking the bullet here, I think for us .. it's a really bad time. The wife is looking at like a 50% pay raise with a masters and I have only sold two houses so far this year. I just feel like what we can get as a family in 2010 is gonna dwarf what we will be looking at '09. Not gonna be a popular choice as far as the extended family goes but kinda what I am seeing for us right now. I keep telling myself when my parents were my age they were renting a brown house in Colorado. It's not the end of the world if we don't buy now. Things turned out great for them. This is turning into one of the hardest decisions me and your mother may make, with how much it could affect our futures. I really think jumping now because we want to or feel pressure to buy is gonna hurt us more than if we wait. Needless to say a lot of prayer is going into this. It's also a complete departure from how I felt even a week ago. The more I pray the more I feel like we should wait. I tend to listen when I hear a little voice telling me to wait. Especially when I put this much prayer into something. That's how we ended up in MD and that has turned out ok.

Life is complicated. But it sure is fun. Ok this is wayy to long.... see ya soon.

Dad.

Six Flags over zombies

So yesterday we went to Six Flags. WOW what an interesting day. First the positives, We picked and absolutely perfect day to go the weather was just right about 80 degrees and it was a Wed. afternoon so there were not alot of people in the park. So you would think Bam it's gonna be on. Well for the most part it was. The rides were fun and the lines were short. Especially if you get what they called "Flash Passes." These things were great you walked right up and got on the ride bypassing the line entirely. But we did not start using them until later in day. Also about a third of the park is a water park and we did not bring our swimsuits. This for me is not an issue as I could swim in my cargo shorts. But for mommy not good... They did sell swimsuits.. for $70. So needless to say no love on that, daddy likes water rides but 70 dollars was a bit much.

I should have noticed the day was gonna be a bit strange when on the second ride Which was a boat ride we got stuck at the top of the hill right before you go into the big plunge. This was not so bad in that we were not on an incline or anything the problem was the crazy trailer park lady in front of us acting like the world had just ended. "ohhh my Gawd!!! This is crazy we are gonna die" Or somesuch gibberish. See I have a finley tuned ignore filter and was doing my best to tune her out. Anyway eventually 7 dudes climbed up this ladder and pushed us to the bottem. It was a little weird to be pushed down a hill on a ride at Six Flags. It must be like what amusement parks were like in caveman times. "Me Ugg!! Me push you down hill" Enh whatever. So we get to the bottom Big splash and everything is fine.....or so I thnk. In fact something horrible had happened. Your mothers hair got wet... Which meant she was gonna talk about having flat hair or messed up hair or how she wishes she had brought a brush .. or my favorite the bathrooms don't have miriors... for hte next 3 hrs. Not in a bad way I love doing stuff with her but it was a bit funny how long this went on. I was kinda waiting for her to melt alla the wicked witch of the west.

It's really only funny because Nicole is so beautiful. She is going on and on about this wet hair. All I can think is Waa chunka waa waaa..... I like her hair wet or dry or died pink... I'm pretty much thinking she's hawt however it is.

Anyway so on with the day. Now enter the Zombies. Ok so the entire park is staffed and visited by people who move just way to slow. Like WTF MOVE. It is unreal to me how people can go through life this way. I mean the Roller Coaster pulls in and we sit there for 4 minutes waiting for people to get off. Then there is another like 4 minute wait for people to get on. Then the idiots can't get the straps buckled right. Or tries to not buckle one of the straps. Like hey I'm not gonna be upside down going 60mph who needs straps. Or hold on someone lost their phone lets empty out the car and start looking for their phone.. Like hello did you not think you were at a theme park. Guess what your phone is gone. When you do loop de loops at 60mph stuff gets lost. Leave it in the car. Who the heck are you trying to call anyway. "Heyyy GRLLLL I be chillin out on the coaster wachuu be doin???" "Na we ain't be moving yet some girl up ahead lost her phone so we be waitn!!" Like really leave it in the car. Although on Batwing I did see a pink phone fly out from somewhere on the train and explode...... it was kinda cool... and now that is one girl who will not be holding up lines anymore.

Not that the staff helped move things along. I guess they must tranquilize all the employees to prevent gang fights or something. These people moved like the undead zombies in night of the living dead. Like "unhhhhhhhhhh" just slowly shuffling their feet. For instance when Nicole went to get a "bangin" burger for lunch there were 3 people in front of her. Not a monumental task to serve 3 people right. Well for them it is. It took so long she gave up. She had fries and my cheese sticks for lunch. If my Roller Coaster tycoon employees moved like that I would uninstall the game and set my hard drive on fire. No wonder this country is in a recession half the people that live here are walking around like they have been dead for 2 years. Unfortunately nothing in the world frustrates me like people who don't move. It's so annoying, move like you have something going on or get the hell out of the way.

Anyway it's about that time that I figured out how to use the Flash passes. This is when the day started going much smoother. Superman was Awesome as far as roller coasters go. There was even this little boy who Nicole made throw a temper tantrum by taking his seat. I think he may have tried to VooDoo curse us. He was not happy. But the Best was definitely Batwing. On this coaster you lay down. So you are on your back or your stomach the whole time. Nicole hated it but I really enjoyed it. The only thing was that once you were done you kinda felt like you had been in a fight. For some reason maybe that i was trying to become one with the seat while hanging upside down like wore me out. I was more than a little discombobulated after the ride. But overall it was fun. I mean it could have been worse my hair could have gotten wet :) We also had alot of fun on the Penguins blizzard River. You kinda sat in this big innertube and spun all over the place going down this chute. It was fun.

The worst of the day was ROAR. Some old wooden roller coaster built for hauling 4 foot tall bodies. I say this because in order to ride it you should have been 4 foot tall and dead. You could barely cram yourself into the seat then once the ride started it just threw you all around. It was an old wooden coaster that was so bumpy and unpleasant to ride I was literally in pain when I got off. Not a Batwing hey I am kinda "off" but like "What the hell are you people trying to do to me?" pain.

Then we kinda walked around water park having knocked out all the rides in like 4 hours. Again it would have been about 3 had I figured out the Flash passes sooner. The water park looks like a hell of a lot of fun. I am almost positive that we will be going back this summer even if just to try those rides. Nicole made the day alot of fun. I am really enjoying summer so far. I love her Wed. work from home days that her and I get to spend together. Then it was really time to go home. Guess what your mom did the second we got in the car.. thats right Brushed her hair. So finally she was happy.

So on the way home we stopped to pick up Ben at Grandma and Grandpas house. Well his babysitters were not there. So I decided it would be fun to open all the cupboards and steal the dog. So that is what we did. I think just for a second my mom panicked. It was kinda funny. Then we went home and Watched the O's come from behind and win again in 10 innings. Magic magic magic magic. That was pretty much the night. Now back to the drudgery of work.. I can't wait till we actually have you around to take to stuff. It was a little funny walking through kiddie land without kids. I felt like everyone was looking at us like we were baby snatchers. But at least you will have cool parents to do stuff with. We got the fun stuff all scoped out.


See you soon.

Dad

O-R-I-O-L-E-S Magic Magic Magic Magic!!!!

Sorry Babaganush, I did not get a chance to update you on the life and times of of the 'Rents the last two days. So I shall do so now... first off on Tuesday night we went to the O's game with one of Nicoles work friends and her boyfriend. They are named Katie and Nick. Two very cool people. I really enjoyed thier company. Katie is an absolute riot.. It's like she is wired on Redbull all the time. She just has energy oozing off of her. I also Enjoyed Nick. He was very laid back and we had alot of fun. I got to go and see your grandpa and grandma who were at the the game as well. Right now Camden yards is just a special and fun place to be. The O's have some life and the city is starting to realize it. There were over 20k people there and almost all of them were in Orange and Black. Now I know you are gonna be very confused about how our house is all Pittsburgh... except for the O's. See the thing is I have never really connected with a baseball team before. The Pirates were so bad for so long I but Ifollowed them. Usually by the end of may the season was over and we started thinking about Football. So when we got here I started going to O's game with Grandpa and Uncle Mike. Then all of a sudden we got a couple young players and started just being a team that is fun to watch. I have never viewed watching baseball as fun. It wasen't not fun it just was not fun I just kinda watched as I like sports and thats really all that is going on from June till Football. Until now .. It's Orioles magic and the team is a blast to watch even on TV. They remind me sooooo much of the Penguins of 2 years ago it's spooky. Well except they don't play on ice have skates nor do they wear helmets. But you know what I mean.

I cannot wait to start taking you down Camden Yards. I gotta admit I am having an absolute blast with baseball right now. I walk around singing the Orioles magic song. I read the Baltimore Sun (which sucks by the way). I have never really had a baseball team to root for and this is one that even when they are down by 3 runs in the 8th still believe they can win. It' s just a whole lot of fun. It does kinda suck we cannot pick up any ground in the division because of the Sox and Rays just will not lose. But we still get to see both of those teams this season so we will see what happens. We also are probably going to end up having to get rid of Millar, Huff and most importantly Roberts. The team has to build for the future you do not go to the playoffs in the ALeast with Huff batting cleanup. Sad but true. The trading deadline it July 31st so I am just trying to enjoy it while I can. I am really feeiling next year this club is going to improve by leaps and bounds. So there are alot of good summers on the Horizon it would seem. I am looking forward to having you be a part of them. We can all go down to the Yard and watch the games You and Edawg and Jax I am sure it will be a blast sharing Baseball with you guys. I am so glad I finally have a team worth sharing. I think it would be much easier when you are young to take you on a cool summers night to an O's game rather than bundleing you up like Ralphie's brother in A Christmas Story to take you to a Winter Steelers game.

2people1pup

OK so in my continuing quest to help you get to know us in '08 I feel like I should let you in on our dirty smelly secret. Well little one the truth about me and your mother is.... We are obsessed with Ben's poop. Not in a normal way like "hey when you took the dog out did he poop?" Kinda way. In fact a conversation that gets had around our house AT LEAST three times a day goes as follows.

I come in the door and the dog runs up the stairs too try to eat Potter(the cat). The problem is he is still hooked up to the leash.. this means two things are gonna happen. A) my arm is about to be separated from my shoulder and B) Ben is going to reach the top of the stairs stretch out his leash and choke the hell out of himself. By the time I pull him back down the stairs to unhook him this starts.

Wife "Did he poop?"

Me "Yeah."

Wife "Was it soft or hard?"

Me "I dunno it was kinda soft I guess"

Wife "Oh god was it the sick poo?"

Me .. at this point I realize that I have to say no or I will be standing outside with the dog the rest of the night "No it was fine"

Wife "are you sure"

Me "yeah it's fine"

Your mother will then kinda give me this look ... it's more of a I know your not giving me the whole story look. Her one Eye gets a little squinty and for a second she kinda looks like a retarted pirate. If I have learned anything in 11years with her hell or high water stick to my story. So the key for me is to then change the subject to anything ... what is on TV .. why does the interweb not work on our desktop anymore (I am almost positve its a router setting but I have no clue.) or the best way to completely make her forget about poop.. What is going on at work?

See the thing is we will have this conversation anywhere..... Regardless of who is around... and it can just happen spontaneously... We could be with relatives... out for a drink .. at church.. We constantly think about and dissect Ben's poop. In all honesty this started because I was at work thinking about the poop he took this morning.. it was soft and a little discolored...I know that he got spoiled at grandmas yesterday and I don't wanna have accidents when I get home. I just thought you should know this. I can only imagine how crazy we will be about your poop. I mean if we put this much time into analyzing our our dogs health by looking at his poo I just can't imagine how crazy it will be with you. Let me just say in the first 6 months I expect at least once a week to have your mother walk all through the house with a dirty diaper to show me the poop and ask if I thought you were ok. For the record I am saying now Yes gawd Yes take the diaper away :P In all honesty the sad thing is not that I really would not be surprised but I actually am expecting it as part of the child having experience. Kinda makes me wonder how important Ben's poops will be then? I think Mommy's head will explode looking at different poops.

Anyway I just wanted to clear all of this up. Just so you know why we spend so much time staring at your poop when you get changed.. It's gonna happen.. again Deal with it.

Moving on it's my Friday.... Woot!! which is Monday for everyone else. I am pretty stoked about this week. I have O's tomorrow and Six Flags on Wed. This will be followed up with ... wait for it .... Pearl Jam this weekend. I am ready to go. Needless to say It should be a whole lot of fun.

I feel like I should give you more for today than just Poop but I am kinda struggling as to what to say next. I am just waiting for work to end so I can begin a very promising weekend. All right yeah I am gonna roll. See you tomorrow.

Dad